This is about Growth

As always this is a content warning. There will be subject matter about and relating to sexual violence. Take care of yourself as we go forward. If this is the end for you, that’s okay. Here’s Gilda.

 

Nine years ago today what seemed like an unbreakable pattern started. It has been nine years since my first assault. That time by a close friend. I won’t get into the nitty gritty. Not again. That’s not what this is about.

This is about nine years later, because ya know? Nine years and eight more assaults later? Still here. I don’t care what anyone else thinks; I know that that is remarkable.

Two years ago it happened again, but as promised this is about growth. This is about how two years or nine years or six years or pick a time frame, I am still here. I have learned. I have overcome. I have put in hard work. My being here is hard earned. I worked, and not all people were okay with me getting better or clawing my way out of my pit, some still aren’t. Some times people will support you, so long as you stay miserable with them. I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to stay miserable. Please don’t. It’s worth digging out of that hole. YOU are worth digging out of that hole. I am worth digging out of that hole.

Does that mean, years later, after all of that work, things are perfect? Not at all. Last night while just goofing around, my body physically froze and tears streamed down my face and my brain filled with flashbacks. Just last night my dreams were largely just nightmares. But today? I’m up again. I am still here. You are still here. Please don’t let anyone get you to believe that that is anything less than completely amazing.

Two years ago, when things got bad I cut all of my hair off. Going forward I decided that as part of my growth, my hair would reflect that. It took a long time. Hell, I lost some of my hair when things were truly bad. But as my brain has healed, my hair has started growing. Maybe that sounds silly to you, but it’s important to me.

I am still here, and today I am very glad for that.

April 25, 2017.

Some time mid April 2018, with much hair loss.

Right this minute and still growing

Five Charcoal Face Products That Will Have you Asking “Is this helping my skin or am I campaigning in Virginia?”

Charcoal in beauty and hygiene products is a cleansing craze, never mind that too much activated charcoal causes you to stop absorbing medications. Here are the top five to ensure you’ll have the finest skin, or be mistaken for wearing blackface by your roommates, who will inevitably help you with your Virginia political campaign.

 

1. This one smooths onto your skin with activated accidental racism. If it’s vegan and gluten-free, it’s not hurting anyone, right??

 

 

2. Accidental racism you can paint on with a brush. You’re an artist now. Black face doesn’t count if it’s in the privacy of your bathroom. Let’s do selfies anyway!

3.Why stop at bathroom black face, when you can peel off your racism from your whole body? Let it dry! Cry while you try to peel it off! Hooray! Now you can make a silly video of you accidentally being racist and attempting to get rid of the evidence!

 

4. What better way to clean out your whiteheads than with some bathroom blackface?  Really scrub it in there. No one is watching. Congratulations! You’re governor now.

 

5. Rub this deep into your skin. Wear it around the house for a little bit. I’m sure you didn’t just do a “Mammy” voice. You’re in your bathroom. You can’t be racist in your bathroom!